How much of our lives are we spending on looking good?

Well, according to this news article, 244 days of our lifetimes and £166,495 on average!

That is an awful lot of time spent preening, and some might question whether it’s the best use of just shy of a year. But I think people often grossly underestimate the importance physical appearance plays in our lives, even if we don’t want to admit it.

Due to the way the human brain is structured, and the way its set up to process large volumes of information and interpret that quickly, not taking care of your looks can cost you dearly.

However evolved and enlightened we like to think we are, there are instinctive, animal parts of the brain that still associate beauty with virtue. Studies have shown that women who tend to their appearance are more likely to be promoted at work and even to be given a lighter sentence in a court of law, not to mention all the innumerable small forms of preferential treatment you can amass during a day.

And although most intelligent women would protest that they don’t use their looks to get ahead, who can honestly say they’ve never tried to bat a mascara’ed lash to get out of a parking ticket, or tugged down their neckline to get served first at the bar? Our appearances are intrinsically linked to who we are and how the world interacts with us, however much we’d all like to deny it. And the figures back this up:

On average over a lifetime, a woman will :

    Try 572 new hair and make-up styles
    Have 298 wardrobe overhauls
    Attempt an average of 1,503 exercise regimes and 228 new diets

What you will spend on average on ‘self-improvement’ in a lifetime:

    Under 25 -£165,607
    25-34 - £131,829
    35- 44 - £109,401
    45-54 - £93,109

It is encouraging to note that self-improvement hasn’t just been classed as image related here -  the figures above also include 17 days of training courses, and £5967 or 16 days learning new skills or broadening cultural horizons.

And geography also plays its part – women in the East Midlands (coincidentially, this is where I live), spend the most on self-improvement at an average of £150,660 followed by ladies in London £143,807, while the least spend goes to girls in the South West (trailing behind at an average of £75,466).

So what do you think? Is the investment in money and time worth it? Should we all be aiming for perfection or do we need to learn to relax and accept ourselves as we are?

Fake it ‘til you make it is my philosophy for life in general and never is that more true than when I go out. I love turning up the glamour to 11 and spending real ‘me time’ pampering and preening. Its an indulgence, it’s a hobby, and it’s a ritual that really puts me in the mood to enjoy myself and socialise.

I know it’s a bit shallow, and I’m certainly not suggesting it’s something I do every day, but I do love to spend a full afternoon getting ready if I have the time. Prep starts days before by scouting the net or glossy magazines for inspiration for my outfit and hair and make-up. On the day, if I have time, I enjoy having a big old bubble bath laden with sweet-smelling oils and skin-softening potions and with skincare, make-up, dressing and having a few ‘pre-game’ drinks, I can quite easily while away a few hours!

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the concept of real vs artificial beauty (see my ‘Morningface’ post for more on this). A lot of people have very strong views on this, ranging from actual cosmetic surgery to ‘non-invasive’ procedures, to all the little enhancements women can call upon to beautify their appearance.

How much is too much? Is it ‘fair’ to get a leg-up on mother nature? Is it all ‘false advertising’? My personal view is that I’ll take anything I can get, and if I could actually afford Botox/ wasn’t deathly afraid of needles, I'd be doing it now! But I don’t want to look ‘plastic’, I just want to look like a better, more radiant version of myself. So I look for products that can cheat me a movie-star glow without going over the top (and on a distinctly un-movie-star-like budget, as well!). I decided it might be fun to tot up all the ‘false’ things that I do before going out and the amount surprised even me…

Freshlook Colorblends

I don’t wear these every time I go out, but depending on the look I’m going for, or how adventurous I’m feeling, I like to use coloured contact lenses to change up my naturally amber eyes. Again, subtlety is key, so my favourite shade is Stirling Grey. If I’m feeling a bit wilder, I’ll wear True Sapphire. These lenses are so comfortable and easy to wear, and are widely believed to be the most natural looking coloured lenses. I certainly don’t think they look obviously fake. If people don’t know me, and I tell them I’ve got brown eyes naturally, they tend to be surprised. If you looked really close up, in good daylight, yeah you can probably tell, but for an evening out, they’re very passable. I just like the combination of blue eyes and dark hair – my dad’s side of the family all has this, and my husband. It’s fun to fake it sometimes!

Jessical Gel nail extensions

 

A lot of women are guilty of this one! This is the beauty fakery I’m least likely to give up. I’m a nail biter and always have been. I do it in moments of absent-mindedness, so its really hard to control. My nails are quite brittle and even if I do manage to get the length naturally, they quickly split and break. So, with a few weeks break during the summer and winter, I mostly wear gel or acrylic extensions. Because my job involved a lot of typing, I always keep the length short, and I also have them shaped oval, which I feel doesn’t look as fake as squared off.  I don’t do those horrible, Katie Price-style day-glo white tips either, preferring a low-key neutral or a funky colour. The polish stays on far longer, and I can do what I like without worrying about them chipping or breaking. This is one that I wouldn’t give up without a fight!

Scholl Party Feet Gel Cushions

Medex Easy White Brush On Tooth Whitener

I do whiten my teeth on a semi-regular basis using a hydrogen gel and bluelight kit. But when I want an extra boost, for a night out, I’ve discovered this amazing paint-on enamel. You brush it onto your teeth and it creates sort of a temporary veneer that comes off when you brush your teeth. It works really well, especially if you want to wear a bright or warm-toned lipstick that can make even white teeth look on the yellowish side. I wouldn’t really consider actual veneers, because a)they look ridiculous and very fake and b) I have zero desire to have my real teeth filed down to little stumps! Yuk. But this product allows you to get that ultra-white finish for a special occasion, without being stuck with day-glo teeth that look ridiculous in daylight. I think this is an acceptable form of fakery, as its still your real smile!

Halo Clip-in Hair Extensions

Everyone wants thick, lustrous Cheryl Cole hair. But here’s the thing: no-one has that hair, not even Cheryl Cole herself. It’s well-known that she wears hair extensions, despite her deal advertising volumising haircare products. Sure, they help and I use them too, but if you really want volume, extensions are the easiest and best route. So always make sure my clip-ins go on when I’m going out. I do not like those obviously fake rapunzel locks though -  remember, I’m all about the stealth fakery -  so I only use extensions the same length and shade as my own hair to add a little volume. Remy hair- or real hair- is the better choice as you can wash, straighten, curl and dye them the same as your own tresses.

Eyelure Naturalites False Lashes

 I’m a well documented false lash addict, and have even worked out how to wear them during the day without looking fake (although I must stress, I certainly don’t wear them everyday). I like my eyes to look like a mascara advert. Improbable, but not impossible! So that very false, glamour model look is something I really try hard to avoid. I’ve tried a lot of brands, and hands down, the Eyelure Naturalites range (or Ultra Naturals for day or an even more light touch) are the best for achieving a look that’s perfect, but still within the laws of physics! They have a clear band and a mix of lash fibre colours to blend in with your own lashes. Great for amping up your flutter without looking like a fraud.

Cleavage Cupcakes Gel bra inserts

Sally Hansen Lip Inflation or Soap and Glory Sexy Motherpucker

This gloss really works to plump up your lips in a hurry, and give you a beestung pout. My lips aren't too thin, but I must admit, I do really like the artificially plumped pout look. I know lots of people think stars like Lindsay Lohan (if she can still be called that at this point!) have a 'trout pout', but I sort of like that overplumped look. But I'm not big on having someone stick a needle in there, so this gloss helps me cheat! A quick slick looks really good.

Sally Hansen Airbrush Legs

I'm a massive fan of this product. If its too hot for tights (and let's face it, in a club or a bar, its usually going to be), this little miracle product is like foundation for your legs and hides a multitude of sins, thread veins, stubble marks, bruises etc, to let you achieve that flawless glow. Combine it with a little shimmer powder stroked down the shin bones and boom! perfect pins can be yours too. Its a small thing that no-one would really notice on it's own, but it really contributes to achieving a perfect look.

L'Oreal Sublime Bronze Wash-Off Instant Tan

I've only just gotten into fake tan. I've ignored it for years, not wanting to be orange. I have golden skin anyway, but that doesn't mean a few harsh winters can't turn me deathly pale! But what really got me into fake tan all of a sudden is actually a desire to make my thighs look slimmer and a desire to become Millie Mackintosh combined. All of a sudden I found myself buying lots of different tanners! I do use Garnier Summerbody, to build up a gradual glow, and then to ramp it up for a night out, this stuff is great to give a one-night-only hit of colour to my pasty limbs. Love it!

Bump-Its

I like big hair Always have done, always will. And so I rely on a few things- namely Clynol Play hair powder, my Denman dressing brush and a damn good hairspray, plus a volumising mousse- to really lock in some va-va-voom for the night. But the best way to get lasting volume that doesn't require hours of painful combing out when you roll home in the early hours? I use Bump-Its, little plastic arches that help me to get volume in the crown or a bump in my fringe. I love them, even though they're a bit gimmicky. 60's Barbarella hair will always rule in my heart!

Spanx

I would not consider a night out without my Spanx, and the same is true of many a Hollywood star and/or Kardashian sister. There's no replacement for gym and diet of course, and nothing is going to drastically change your silhouette, but even if you are slim, there's something about control underwear that just smooths out all those stubborn lumps and bumps and makes you ultra-confident in a slinky frock. Of course, being married, it doesn't bother me to parade around in my Bridget Joneses in front of the husband, but if you are single, it could be a bit more problematic if you get lucky in your beige high-waisters! I wouldn't feel happy going out without my control undies, and I have an extensive wardrobe of styles. Seriously, I do. Briefs, seamless boy shorts, bottom shaping, strapless shifts.

So those are my dirty little cheat secrets that means that when I'm out and about, what you see isn't quite what you get!

What are your top cheats to fake flawless? Let me know!

Hello Dolls

It's been a couple of weeks since I've updated on my progress on the 5:2 Diet. There have been highs and lows in the past couple of weeks, but the most amazing part is that I've actually managed to stick to it for three weeks, which is a personal best of mine for any diet, ever. I hope I can keep going until my holiday in September!

So, how has it been? Well, some days have been really tough. Going to bed with an empty stomach is never any fun. But overall the fasting days have been getting easier. My last fasting day was brilliant. I only had an apple (and a lot of zero-calories fluids, usually water or hot water with lemon juice, some black coffee and the odd peppermint tea), and then beans on wholemeal toast all day, but I wasn't really hungry. I felt light and buzzy, full of energy, and none of that post-lunch slump I usually get.

After week one, I found I had lost a pound in weight and I was delighted. I did military bootcamp and no carbs for a MONTH before my wedding and only lost a pound total, so a pound in a week felt amazing and really spurred me on.

However, at the end of week two, I discovered I hadn't lost anything further. I was really gutted, after I'd been so good sticking to it. My body is awful. It clings stubbornly onto every pound. My weight never fluctuates, and even staving myself two days a week appears to have had no change. I was extremely down after that. But my husband was quick to tell me that weight loss is not an exact science, especially when you don't have lots to lose, which consoled me a bit. My colleagues who first switched me onto the diet told me the weight loss can plateau - but after just one pound? That's frankly a bit disappointing.

I am frustrated and this is where I'd normally give up. But this time, I've decided to hit back harder. As of this week, I am:

• Switching to 4:3 as a ratio, at least until I see something start to happen
• Not weighing myself anymore until before my holiday

I still feel good within myself, even though I haven't lost anything more, so I'm going to carry on for the time being. I feel like this diet is actually strengthening my willpower - I did read somewhere once that the best way to get more of it is actually to use some, like a muscle- and its also helping me to be more aware of what goes into my body, and to appreciate what I do eat. So for now, I'm soldiering on! This could be a long-term form of weight control for me, who knows. Wish me luck!

Another attempt at doing an outfit posting!

This weekend, I went down to Cambridge to visit Lady T. We always have the best nights out! We do stick out like a sore thumb though, because Cambridge as a city is ridiculously dressed-down. The girls mostly wear jeans and flat shoes to the bars at night, which is a total contrast to Nottingham, Leeds, Manchester etc where the vibe is a lot more dressed up and you’d look odd without heels. Anyway, T and I both love an opportunity to get dolled up and crack out a power frock, so we usually just do our own thing regardless. It’s not us who are over-dressed, they’re all under-dressed, dammit!

I wore

White mesh pencil dress – George at Asda

So, there's a bit of a story behind this dress. I originally ordered a white leather dress from Missguided with cut out panels to wear. It was tagged as a 'blogger's favourite' and I was super-excited to have ordered something edgy and directional. However, when it came, I instantly hated it on. It just didn't fit or flatter. Perhaps I'm not ready to be edgy!

Cue a mad, last minute dash around the shops. I was determined to find a white dress (preferably with mesh inserts) to show of my newly-acquired tan. Of course, wanting something so specific, I was guaranteed not to find it. Dashes to Zara and Topshop had yielded nothing and I was getting desparate....until I went to Asda to do my food shopping.

Remembering the surprise success of the party flats I found there, I decided to dash upstairs on a last minute mission...and low and behold...there, staring me in the face was exactly the dress I'd been looking for. It was uncanny! And even better, it was in the sale!! I paid just £8. I'd always written Asda clothes off as being frumpy and aimed at mums (most of them are, its true) so I never expected to find something as flattering as this. It looked gorgeous on and far more expensive than it was, which is really important when you buy a white dress in particular, as they show every lump and bump up. I was so impressed!

White, black and gold, multi-strand necklace -  Topshop

This is cheating a bit, because I wore this necklace in my last outfit post, but it’s a favourite of mine at the moment so I couldn’t resist popping it on again.

Grey round patent shoes with cream snakeskin heels - All Saints

These shoes actually belong to Lady T, who kindly lent them to me for the evening after I spontaneously decided against my own Maison Martin Margiela for H&M perspex wedges, which I hadn't broken in and was pretty sure would hurt my tootsies...I danced all night and not a twinge of pain...although some dude did spill Grey Goose all down my legs, so they might have gotten a vodka polish!

Grey jersey quilted chain-strap bag -  Topshop (not pictured as I forgot!)

This is clearly an ‘homage’ to the Chanel 2.55, re-imagined in slouchy grey jersey, which I really like. It takes a very formal bag shape and subverts it with an ultra-casual fabric. The thing I like the best about this bag is the fluorescent coral lining!

Rose gold boyfriend watch -  Michael Kors

Pretty much my go-to accessory at the moment, I'm sure I'm over-wearing this, but I just love it so much. It toughens up a pretty frock and heels an absolute treat.

Make-Up

I thought red lips would be a nice contrast with the white dress, so I made these the focus of my look. I created a dewy base first using a blob of Mac Strobe Cream mixed into some Chanel Lift Lumiere foundation, buffed in using my Real Techniques stippling brush.

I contoured my cheeks with some Mac Matte Bronzer as I wanted to keep them neutral. As I was doing red lips, my eye-makeup needed to not compete but to have enough impact to balance out the face. I defined my brows using Mac eyeshadow in Charcoal Brown with a slanted brush. Lids were kept neutral -  Dainty Doll Eyeshadow Base in ‘Frankie’, topped with Urban Decay ‘Booty Call’ from the Naked 2 palette. I used the shade ‘Tease’ from the same palette to gently define the crease and provide some depth.

After creating a strong, graphic wing shape using Eyeko Skinny Mini eyeliner, I smoked out the edges with ‘Blackout’ from the palette. In the corners of my waterline, I used the black Rimmel Scandaleyes Waterproof Kohl.  Underneath my lash line, I ran a thin line of ‘Pistol’ -  this helps give definition, but not as harshly as black. A couple of coats of L’Oreal False Lash Flutter and some Eyelure Naturalites lashes completed the look. My lips were lined with Rimmel 1000 Kisses Lasting Definition and then I used my all-time hero red – Chanel Rouge Coco Shine in ‘Rebelle’.

Nails

I used the new Rimmel nail polishes I got to create this manicure - a base of beige using 'Caramel Cupcake' and tips in 'Black Cherries'.

Hair

Big ass hair and a Pornstar Martini!

I wanted a big hair, sort of a ‘modern Barbarella’ look to contrast with the futuristic design of my dress. I prepped by washing with Tigi Bedhead Superstar shampoo, which is sulphate-free and gives big hair! Followed up with a hit of moisture from Herbal Essences Dazzling Shine mask. When still wet, I added in some L’Oreal Elvive Collagen Volumising Mousse to lock in the volume, and a bit of John Frieda Frizz-Ease Thermal Protect serum, and blowdried upside down- this really helps to get big hair!

To style, I started by massaging in some Clynol Powder Punch, which is a shot of volumising hair powder. I then swept up the top part of my hair into a big beehive, which is my current favourite style! I used the Denman Dress Out Brush (my new secret hair weapon!) to backcomb at the roots, along with lashings of Schwarzkopf Got2Be Happy Hour hairspray. I’m in love with this hairspray - it smells sooo good, like coconut cocktails, and the hold really lasts without giving crispy hair. It’s a definite winner and performs well above its affordable price tag.

Then I pushed up the hair at the back and fixed with Kirby grips and more hairspray! The remaining lengths were straightened and I boosted them with a few clip-in extensions.

My Night Out Playlist

Lady T and I partying hard!

Music is a hugely important part of my getting ready ritual before I go out, so I thought I’d share what was on my playlist that night and getting me in the mood to dance:

Night by Night – Chromeo (Skream remix)
XXXO – M.I.A (Jay-Z remix)
Give It 2 U – Robin Thicke ft Kendrick Lamar
Get Lucky – Daft Punk
Drop It Like It’s Hot – Snoop Dogg ft Pharrell Williams
Sweet Talk - Kito & Reija Lee
All Night – Jack Beats ft John B (Skream remix)
White Noise – Disclosure ft AlunaGeorge
Holy Grail - Jay-Z and Justin Timberlake

Hi Dolls

So, I've survived my very first week on the intermittent fasting diet, and I have to say, although its been challenging, I've actually kind of- sort of-whisper it- enjoyed it. I know. Weird, right? Not something I thought I would ever catch myself saying.

I think its because I have the virtuous glow of self-denial (if only for two days). I feel like I challenged myself and I actually stood my ground. My sketchy willpower somehow triumphed. And even though its only one week down, I feel like I might really be in with a chance here.

My second fasting day on Thursday was really tough. I was insanely hungry and even though I knew it was only for a day, my willpower seemed a lot weaker than on my first fasting day. I felt like I might actually crack. It seemed so much harder! Luckily, because I work with a couple of people who've done the diet, they are helping to guide me through the highs and lows, and they said that it was probably because I knew what was coming this time.

I managed to start my day off with a hot water, lemon juice and chilli powder. Then I just had a plain green salad with a small pot of cottage cheese. Dinner was a slice of wholemeal toast with half a can of baked beans. I had some mini Babybels in my bag, rather randomly, and I was so close to cracking in the afternoon and falling headfirst into a pile of cheese! Just managed to resist.


In the evening, as much to keep myself busy as anything, I went to the gym and despite the heat, did an okay workout - 20 minutes of intervals on the cross trainer, 10 minutes of interval running on the treadmill and 15 minutes of abs and core work. So I felt light as a feather and so pleased with myself coming out of the gym.

On the other days, I've been eating normally, but trying not to go overboard. Today I did slip up a little. I took my car in for an MOT and service just before lunch, and it was there until 4pm! I had no idea it would take that long and I hadn't eaten all day by the time it was ready to go. I was hungry, tired and fed up then, and I'm afraid the McDonald's drive through claimed me. I felt quite guilty about that one, even though you can technically eat whatever you like on a non-fasting day.I'm going to try not to repeat that mistake!

On the whole, I'm enjoying the diet. I don't think I've actually lost any weight yet (scales read the same on Tuesday and Thursday, although perhaps it takes time to show?!) but I feel lighter and somehow happier within myself. I am beginning to understand why people say they 'look forward' to their fasting days. I can actually see this becoming a lifestyle thing for me. There's a buzz that comes with fasting and I also feel like practicing little acts of willpower is helping me.

I feel like its teaching me the value of food, and that I'm enjoying it more when I do eat something. My brain has finally cottoned onto the fact that saying 'no' to something is not the end of the world.

I really hope the weight loss starts soon and I begin to see results. If nothing in a week or so, I might have to consider upping the intervals to 4:3 and see if that helps.

Wish me luck!

So, as I mentioned, I started the 5:2 or 'Fast Diet' yesterday. I decided to do it spontaneously on hearing from some workmates how easy it was and how it had worked well for then. I'll be trying to follow it for 8 weeks, until I go on holiday to Ibiza in September.

Yesterday was the day I decided to do the diet and also the day that I had my first 'fast' day.

And it actually went pretty well! Obviously it's only the very first hurdle, but I have been known to fail even at this early stage! Of course I was hungry. But it's totally do-able because you only have to tell yourself to wait until tomorrow- and even I can do that!

I decided to play the first day a bit by ear. There aren't any rules about what you eat or when on a fast day- only that you can't have more than 500 calories in total.

For me, if I eat breakfast, I get hungier during the day. It's ironic but true- if I have a big breakfast, I usually want to eat again about 11am! So I decided to see how long I could go without feeling ravenous.

I had a cup of tea with semi skimmed milk when I woke up (tea is a non-negotiable deal breaker for me!) and then just had a black coffee. I was alright most of the morning but felt really hungry about 12. This is usual for me, even if I have breakfast!

I ate lunch at about quarter to one. I had some watermelon and a peach and 200ml of unsweetened almond milk to fill me up. I also had a Diet Coke. I felt filled up enough just on that, which surprised me. I think it helped that I love watermelon so it felt like a treat- albeit a low calorie one!

I'm not going to lie, I was starving in the afternoon. About 4pm my tummy was rumbling so hard in a meeting, really embarrassing! I just tried to drink water and I was really busy at work which helped a lot to take my mind off it.

I walk to and from work (about 40 minutes each way) and I felt really sick on the journey home. It could have been hunger but there's a big heat wave here at the moment so the humidity didn't help.

I got home late so my husband had prepared dinner. He didn't know about my diet as I'd only decided on it that morning, but thankfully dinner was a light one anyway - just an omelette (two eggs, no filling) and a green salad, with a few oven chips.

I would have thought I'd wolf it down but I actually are quite slowly as I was feeling a bit queasy still. Felt satisfied but still very sick for about an hour after dinner, but I just kept sipping water and trying to ignore it.

The only major sense of sacrifice I had today was that I was only allowed one cup of tea this evening. Normally I have one when I sit down and one before bed, but I had to cut out the one at bedtime, which felt like a bit of a wrench! Trust tea to be what breaks me! However, anything seems to be possible when it's only one day! I stuck to my 500 cals with less suffering than you might expect. Being a bit hungry (but not starving) at bedtime is easily ignored when you can just look forward to porridge the next day!

I probably still didn't drink enough water, partly because I was so ridiculously busy at work it didn't occur to me.

On the exercise front, excuse central! I got home too late to fit in a gym visit and I felt it was too humid and hot for a run, so I guess today is my one 'off day'! I hate when work interferes with my downtime but unfortunately it couldn't be helped. I never have enough time for everything. I did obviously walk a few miles on my way to and from work, so I wasn't completely inactive.

Verdict so far: Ok, it's only day one and there's a long way to go until the 8 week mark. But although I've been hungry, it's all been bearable thinking that the next day I can eat normally again. I really think this could work for me and I'm actually excited to see if I can stick to it. Feeling so sick for a few hours was a bit horrid, but maybe that will go in time. I almost quite enjoyed feeling 'empty' and light for once. I can see how experienced 5:2 ers sometimes say they 'look forward' to their fast days. Wish me luck!